It has been just about a month since my wife and I found out she was pregnant. Which means than in about 7 months I’m going to be a dad.
At this point it isn’t really real. She’s not showing at all, and the initial ultrasound really doesn’t look like anything. So at this point I know it’s real, but at the same time it doesn’t seem like it. In a way that’s good, it gives us some time to process the change to our life (this will be our first child).
For the last several months we’ve talked about having a baby (well, really for a few years, but more so in the last 6 or 7 months). I’ve always been nervous, and even a little hesitant about the idea. A big part of it is just the change. As I mentioned earlier, this is our first, so it’s clearly a big change in our lives.
I realize it’s selfish, but a big part of my hesitation to change is that I always thought it would take away from my “me time”. But I’ve spent the last few months watching other people at work, watching friends who have kids, and I realized that it just changes what “me time” means. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
Another of my hesitations is that there are certain times of the year I work a lot of hours. My wife too. Twelve or more hours in a day is not unheard of. Again, I’ve watched my co-workers. I’m not the only one working a lot, and they make it balance. At some point it dawned on me that I’m not the only one who has gone through this (I know, that’s obvious, but it’s hard to wrap your head around simple things sometimes).
One of the strangest moments for me was the night we took the test and found out my wife was pregnant. The test was positive, and somehow I just knew I was ready. Despite some of my reservations, I wasn’t panicked or worried, I just knew it was right. It’s a hard thing to describe if you haven’t been through it, but I imagine some of your readers know what I’m talking about even if it wasn’t about a kid (I’ve had similar feelings when we bought our house – it was just right).
So even though things aren’t quite real just yet, I think I’m as ready as I can be for now. I’ve still got some adjustment time, and I know that the reality of having a baby will continue to grow but I’m finally ready for it!